MATTERS OF INTEREST

LEADER OF THE OPPOSITION

The Hon. K.J. MAHER (15:22): I rise to speak about the Liberal Party leadership, and I do so reluctantly, Mr President. It is not because I want to, but the Liberal Party so regularly changes their leaders that it cannot avoid being mentioned.

I am afraid the new Leader of the Opposition is quickly earning the reputation as the Basil Fawlty of South Australian politics. His Basil Fawlty tendencies became obvious a couple of months ago when he claimed that the government does not have a mental health strategy. Journalists at this press conference pointed out that there is a strategy on the health department website, and I will quote:

But it was overlooked by Mr Marshall, who was confused when questioned about it by journalists.

And the Basil Fawlty of SA politics was forced into what was described as an embarrassing back-down. You can just hear Basil Fawlty saying, 'They've got no plan, none at all, not a bit of a plan—oh, actually, it looks like they might have a plan, a bit of a plan. Actually, it's a complete plan. It's published right here on this website. It appears I was wrong—rather completely and utterly and spectacularly wrong.' Then literally, on the eve of him becoming opposition leader, there appears a profile piece in the Sunday Mail . And Basil thinks it would be a good idea to do his interview on his racing yacht. The article says the Leader of the Opposition, and I quote:

...time and again asks whether or not he needs to be worried about how he will be portrayed in this interview.

So the Basil Fawlty of SA politics was wondering whether a profile piece that includes his yacht as a central element will endear him to the South Australian public—most of whom manage to get by each day without their own racing yacht. Well, maybe he should have listened to his advisers who, as revealed in the profile piece, warned against using the yacht. Basil: 'Ah, yes, the yacht—I thought maybe the everyday punter might be grateful for the opportunity to see such a fine specimen of a racing vessel.' It is not just his advisers who thought it was a bad idea. Some Liberals have privately commented that it showed all the political acumen of the member for Finniss' Twitter account.

Next, soon after he was elected leader, the Basil Fawlty of SA politics congratulated himself on Twitter by retweeting a tweet from Mike Rann. The only problem was, it was not from Mike Rann. It was from a fake Mike Rann. But it did not occur to our Basil that a tweet from an ex-Labor premier saying how capable Basil is, and also denigrating both a Labor minister and an important local industry, might happen to be fake. Others in the twittersphere had to point out to Basil that he had been congratulating himself with fake congratulations.

But where would Basil be without his supporting cast? Sybil Fawlty? It has to be his deputy, his deputy in the lower house, the member for Bragg. It would certainly explain a few things: 'Basil, Basil, let's oppose small bars, Basil.' Basil: 'But dear Sybil, I'm not sure that would look very good.' Sybil: 'Basil, I'm already on the record in Hansard opposing small bars and while we're at it, let's oppose any development or progress.' While the possible intimate conversations of the Liberal leadership team do not bear thinking about, such conversations would certainly explain the Liberal Party's position on a lot of things, particularly its backflip recently on small bars.

On to the Major: clearly Alexander Downer, an old, befuddled ex-soldier who keeps wanting to refight the war, the war going on inside the Liberal Party, the decades-old war, the Chapman and Evans war—'Ah, yes, Fawlty, don't mention the war. I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it. I told them on the wireless that I have no current plans to be the leader of the Liberal Party at this stage. Tricked 'em good and proper, Fawlty. Anyway, none of the chaps at the Adelaide Club listen to the wireless. Nothing to worry about, Fawlty. Yes, yes, muskets at dawn, Fawlty.'

Then there is poor, hapless Manuel, the member for Morialta, perhaps best known to many of us in the Labor Party for his enthusiasm in setting up and taking down polling booths—'Manuel, I'm sacking you from the shadow ministry.' Manuel: 'Que, Mr Fawlty?' 'You're sacked, no more portfolio. Understand?' 'Ah, si, Mr Fawlty. How about whip then?' 'Oh, for God's sake, Manuel, you can be whip. Now, get out of your office.'

I will conclude by saying that our state cannot afford this cast of characters, least of all can South Australia afford this Basil Fawlty, a man so lacking in judgement that he thinks he can just cruise and sail into office, bumble about the place retweeting fake tweets, ignoring departmental plans and behaving as if he can run South Australia as some sort of second-rate English seaside hotel.